Although I’d heard this so many times, I’m finally realizing first-hand that maintaining a marriage post-baby requires a lot of time and energy – the two things I can’t get enough of right now. Between the late-night feedings and constant diaper duty, finding quality time with Jordan feels like an impossible stretch. It’s been a little bit over a month, but I’m already learning so much about relationships (and patience!) after a baby. The first time we left Bennett at home to go eat dinner, I teared up no less than seven times. But now, I totally understand why the two of us getting out of the house is so important. Dishing some of my thoughts on why having regular date nights are so essential to prioritize each week.
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Keep Reading The Importance of Regular Date Nights
More Date Night Picks from Soma:
Communication and connection
Communication is probably one of the most important foundations in a relationship – and there’s no better way to build on that than spending alone time together. Once we brought Bennett home, I noticed that there became so many disruptions in our normal routine, which hinders communication between the two of us. And – let’s be honest – that can lead to a lot of frustration too. Not to mention, most of the actual conversations we have are about the baby now. Getting away for date night is a great opportunity to allow those lines of communication to flow about topics that aren’t baby-related. I’ve also heard that it’s important to have a conversation for at least 15 minutes that’s NOT about the baby with your significant every day.
Press reset on stress
Since becoming a parent, I sometimes find myself nitpicking every single thing when it comes to Bennett. How he’s off his schedule, how the bottles weren’t washed, or how this specific house chore still needs to be taken care of… It’s so easy to get caught up in a cycle and focus only on the stressful things as we adjust to parenthood. Date nights are a great way to press reset and get away from the stress associated with staying home with the baby. Plus, it gives me something to look forward to at the end of an exhausting week! That glass of wine at dinner is definitely a reward for all those sleepless nights.
Make the time
Before Bennett, Jordan and I were always able to fly-by-the-seat-of-our-pants, but now it’s extremely hard to function without a schedule. Instead of booking last minute dinner plans, we are living by a shared calendar that looks months in advance. And we’re definitely realizing how important it is to make plans to do something for US each week. In fact, I think having the calendar actually ensures that we spend more quality time together than before the baby!
Tips for fitting date nights into your routine
Date nights don’t have to be a full-blown production since it’s more about spending time together alone. It can be as simple as cooking dinner and watching a movie when the baby’s asleep. We like to pick a show and binge watch – right now we are very into GOT. But I still want a reason to get dressed up since that’s what makes me feel my best. With the warmer weather, I’ll usually opt for a dress. And if you love to wear dresses as much as I do, then I can’t recommend the Soma Vanishing Strapless Bra enough! I’ve always felt like so many strapless bras were uncomfortable or not that supportive. But this one is completely life changing. It’s SO soft, but the best part is the fit. It stays in place and I never have to worry about it tugging or pinching. The shape is also natural and supportive, which is exactly what this mama needs! No one wants to feel uncomfortable on a rare date night, so I love wider band around the back. It stays put but also feels super comfortable.
If you need a few dress options for any date nights coming up, Soma offers some really great options. I love this effortless floral midi dress I’m wearing in today’s post. It’s forgiving and comfortable for postpartum. Combined with the bra, consider yourself set for a lot of future date nights!
Thanks to Soma for sponsoring this post. As always, all opinions and product choices are my own.
Photos by Lainey Reed